♪ Hear the legends of the Kung Fu Panda! ♪
♪ Doo-doo-doo-doo doo-bom doo boom-boom! ♪
♪ Raised in a noodle shop ♪
♪ never seeking glory or fame ♪
♪ he climbed the mountain top ♪
♪ and earned the Dragon Warrior name. ♪
♪ Hu! Ah! Ya! ♪
♪ Kung Fu Panda! ♪
♪ Doo-doo-doo-doo- sho-bom, doom-doom-doom! ♪
♪ Master Shifu saw the warrior blossom ♪
♪ and master the skills of bodacious and awesome ♪
♪ Kung Fu Panda. ♪
♪ Doo-doo-doo-doo doom-doom-doom-doom! ♪
♪ He lives, he trains ♪
♪ and he fights with the Furious Five ♪
♪ protect the Valley somethin' somethin' ♪
♪ somethin' somethin' alive ♪
♪ Oh! Ah! Uh! ♪
♪ Kung Fu Panda ♪
♪ Legends of awesomeness. ♪
Sweet!
3x03 - The Break Up
sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ addic7ed.com ~
You see, guys, the key to picking a lock
is a will of iron and a steady... ah, darn it, I dropped the...
Can you just... just pick it up.
Just give it! Gol, about time.
Anyway, as I was saying... click!
I know, just like that, it's open.
Well, if you'd hold the light where I could see... aah!
Ow! Darn it!
Why can't you just... oof!
If you guys want some noodles,
it's best to stop by during business hours.
Oh, are you kidding? Gary!
I'm just at the part where the milkmaid
falls in love with the stable boy.
We're not talking about milkmaids.
We're talking about you botching lookout duty. Look!
- See? Him. - 'Sup?
Darn it, Gary. Look, this job is tough enough without...
Trying to pick a lock when the key is under the mat?
- Uh, hate to interrupt... - No, hang on, guy.
Listen, you know what, Gary? I'm sick and tired
of your know-it-all attitude, and your fancy words,
and your book-reading... with your eyes!
You're the worst croc bandit ever.
Yeah... you guys have a lot to talk about, so...
No, no, don't go. I want you all to hear this.
- Oh, yeah? - Fung...
- I am tired of your insults. - Oh.
- Your insensitivity... - Ooh.
- What's up with that? - Oh.
And your constant mispronunciation of my name.
- What? - It's "Gah-ri."
- "Gah-ri"! - Oh, yeah, Gah-ri?
Well, I think I have a solution to your problem.
- Me too. I quit! - You're fired!
- I quit. - You're fired.
- No, no, I quit. - You can't quit,
- 'Cause you're fired. - I'm fired?
- No, you're fired. - No... how am I fired? I'm the leader.
Um... I'm gonna go ahead and fight you now.
Huh? Oh! Oh, gosh... I'm sorry, guy, sure.
Everyone but Gary... attack!
- Oops. - What?
Ow!
Everyone but Gary... retreat!
Hey, thanks for the...
Why don't we all go inside for a... a nice cup of tea?
I wish I could.
But don't let me stop you two from, uh, you know...
Where are you going? You can't just stick me
- with a sobbing crocodile. - Sorry, Dad, I-I got midnight patrol.
It's important, you know, I'm, uh...
Dragon Warrior, I know, I know.
Mr. Big pants always got something important to do.
Thanks for your understanding.
Uh, good to see you, Gah-ri.
You too. Uh, bye, Dad!
Two, three...
Dad! Dad...
Gah-ri?
- Dad, what's Gah-ri doing back here? - Back? He never left.
You can be honest, despite my obviously fragile state.
You're letting him make soup? In your kitchen?
With your good ladle? You never even let me touch it.
It's fantastic. You're a natural, Gah-ri. A natural.
He has broth in his blood, noodles in his soul.
I'll be the judge of that. Hit me.
- Needs salt. - Oh, good tip.
I'm always up for constructive criticism.
Not like the abuse I took from Fung.
- It's okay.
Why don't you go take a break,
- and go wait on some tables? - Thanks, Mr. Ping.
I don't know what I'd do without you.
Oh, Gah-ri.
Dad, why are you letting him hang out with you?
- He's a croc bandit. - Was. Once upon a time.
Once upon a time yesterday!
Now you're letting him touch your ladle.
Gah-ri is a changed croc, Po.
And you seemed fine enough to leave me alone with
him last night so you could go off Dragon Warrioring.
Oh, well, he was upset, so I -I didn't think that he was... fine.
But don't think I won't be keeping my
eye on him, 'cause I will. Both of 'em.
After I have a little... ow!
I'm so glad you enjoyed your meal.
Please let me know if there's anything,
anything at all, I can get you two lovely ladies.
Well, could you recommend a dessert?
- Oh, you know what's awesome is the... - I was talking to Gah-ri.
- Oh. Sorry. - I highly recommend the coconut balls.
- Oh, but my waistline. - Mrs. Yoon, if I may be so bold,
you look sveltely ravishing.
I'll bring you two orders. It'll just be between us.
Oh, you.
That's the most expensive item on the menu,
and he's already sold five today.
I can't believe I ever got along without him.
Great.
Dad! Dad!
- What, Po? What's wrong? - What happened to my room?
Oh, Gah-ri did a little rearranging when he moved in.
I think it looks better.
- Has a nice flow. - Gah-ri moved into my room?
Uh, son, you live at the Jade Palace now.
- I didn't think you would mind... - Where are my action figures?
Wow. Guy can really wrap.
And fold. And braid.
Well, this is fine. I guess.
Gah-ri's really turned his life around.
Yeah, he hasn't stolen anything in a whole week.
- Real impressive. - I'm glad you like Gah-ri too, Po...
because there's something I want to tell you.
I'm adopting him.
Dad? Dad!
- Dad, can we talk about this? - Uh, Po, we'll have to do it later.
Since your new brother got here,
I can't keep up with the new customers.
Here, let me help you with these... dad.
- Oh, Po, you know that I... - Sorry to interrupt,
but if we don't clear these tables,
we'll never be ready for the dinner rush.
He's such a hard worker.
Okay, listen up, guys.
That ingrate Gary is gone,
so I'm gonna need a new second-in-command.
That's the number-two guy.
- All right? So here's what... - Um... what's an ingrate?
Okay, all right. You know, it's like... um, okay...
it's like someone who's ungrateful. All right? There you go.
- So what I'm looking for in the... - Wouldn't that be an un-grate?
Anyways. I've, like, designed some scenarios
to test you guys' reactions under pressure, so...
scenario!
All right, you're coming out of a store.
You just robbed it, right?
When you see two figures in the moonlight.
Who do you attack? Okay, you only have a split-second...
Quit it! Knock it off!
Ow!
Gah! Darn it, guys.
You know what? Just forget it.
Just take five.
You want us to punch you five more times?
- Ooh. Come here. - What?
- Just... hand me that. - You want the helmet.
- Yes. Thanks. - Here you go.
No, I don't mean hit me five more times!
I mean take a break! Gol!
- Ow! - Ow! Po?
- Call it a draw? - Draw.
So... missing your buddy?
No. In fact, I'm finding a replacement for him right now.
Really? How's that going?
Get it off me! Get it off me!
Aw, who am I kidding? Gah-ri was the best.
He was my number-two.
I just let him walk away, just walk away.
He was, like, the best bandit ever.
I remember this one time when this thing happened.
Ha, that was great. And this other one time,
there was this whole other thing.
Oh, man. I never thought I'd live that one down.
You know I can't see what's going on in your head, right?
Do I... duh!
Of course I know that. Gah!
Like, who wouldn't know something like that?
Like, everyone knows that. Even babies know that.
Oh, what's it matter now?
Gah-ri's probably already got a new gang.
It's all awesome and stuff,
and, like, they're totally doing everything.
Actually, he's just working for my Dad at the noodle shop.
- You don't mean... - Yeah.
He's earning an honest living. And what's worse? My Dad...
- wants to adopt him. - What?
I-I just... I think... oh...
You, uh, okay over there?
Uh, no problem.
It's just, you know, uh... eye sweat, you know?
Right. Yeah, totally.
Probably won't be long before they both forget us.
You're right.
- We gotta do something. - Yeah! What?
Something that is clever, incredibly well thought out,
and super brilliant!
- Oh. - Yeah.
Now remember, Fung. Once they...
Once Dad and Gah-ri see that we've replaced them with you
and me, they'll get jealous and come running back to us.
Oh, man, this is gonna be... Oh, here they come.
Stop it! Oh, stop it!
I can't take it! Oh, Dad...
Ha, didn't see you there.
My best buddy Fung was telling me
a deliciously ribald story about...uh... stuff.
Yeah. We're, um... we're friends.
May I take your order?
Uh, yeah, two bowls of your finest noodle soup.
Nothing's too good for my inseparable pal Fung.
Did you see their faces? I...
A badger?
Oh, you're killing me, Fung.
Kill. Ing. Me.
Mmm, this is... wow. This is really good.
- Did you make this? - Yes. Do you really like it?
Oh, yeah. The noodles are so tender.
What is this, like, soo... soo-soo...
"soo-zechoo-wan" style?
It's pronounced "Szechuan."
What? Oh, so now I'm, like, stupid?
- Huh? - Uh, yeah.
If the tiny, uncultured brain fits, like, wear it.
- Uh...Easy, fellas, I, uh... - Ugh!
Hey, ow! Loser... guy.
- Don't be mad at Fung, Dad. - I'm not.
I'm mad at you for bringing him here and upsetting Gah-ri.
Oh... now get out.
Out!
There, there...
Remember what they said in meditation class.
Breathe.
- Darn it. - Fung, what are you doing here?
I got another idea how to get me back Gah-ri,
And you back your Dad.
Really? What is it? What is it?
Wait, is it illegal? 'Cause then you shouldn't tell me.
Just come with me, okay, guy?
Aw...
All right. I'll be right back, guy.
- Keep a look out. - Fine, just hurry.
Gah.
Oof!
- How'd it go? - No problem.
By morning, Gary will be back on the wrong side of the law.
- Where did you get this? - I-I have no idea.
That's the thief, officer. Ha!
So you're telling me you woke up this morning, and the porcelain
vase of Hongwu just magically appeared at your bedside?
Ha, ha. Do you think I'm a fool?
Sir, I... Dad, I, uh...
I'll tell you what happened.
- I took it. - What?
Dad, what are you doing? You didn't steal the vase.
- Fung and I... - Clam it, dough boy.
- Now slam me in the clinker. - Dad, stop it.
We planted the vase there to try to frame Gah-ri.
No point trying to cover for your father, Dragon Warrior.
- But it's the truth! - Come along, Mr. Ping.
It's Chor Ghom prison for you.
Oh, son. Please take care of the noodle shop while I'm gone.
- But... Dad. - I was talking to Gah-ri.
How could you?
Well, that didn't work. See ya, guy.
Well, we got him into this mess,
and we're gonna get him out of it.
Yeah. We... we can get him out of there.
That's... totally cool.
That's right, I'm bad.
Don't do the crime if you can't do the time.
- Hold it right there. - What are you doing here?
I've come for my Dad. He didn't steal that vase.
Beat it or I'll open up a steaming wok of whoop-butt on both of you.
Dad, okay, okay. I know what I did was wrong.
I messed up. I thought you were trying to replace me.
What? Of course I wasn't. Po...
You'll always be my son.
Thanks, Dad. So...
Take me away, flat foot.
What? Are you really going to go to prison
- just to teach me a lesson? - Yes.
Dragon Warrior, I order you to step aside immediately.
Not without my father.
That makes you a criminal as well. Detain them!
Sorry, I... oof!
Gah!
Stop!
Gah, he said stop!
May I see that vase a moment?
Uh-huh. Yeah. Just as I suspected.
This vase is a fake.
These markings were made with a Loki Qi Chi tool, which hadn't
been invented when the real porcelain vase of Hongwu was created.
Ooh, uh, yes, of course. Ha, ha, I-I see your point.
I should've caught that myself.
Well, uh, since no crime has been committed...
release him. My apologies, Mr. Ping.
- Dirty screw. - Come, gents, we must away.
Thanks for everything, Mr. Ping, but...
I think maybe I should be moving on.
- I've got some things to sort out. - Oh, okay, Gah-ri.
But you always have a room at the noodle shop.
Uh, uh, provided Po's not using it, of course.
So... um... any idea where you're headed?
I mean, I could forward your mail and stuff.
Well...
It's too bad that vase isn't real, right?
We could've made a fortune.
- It is real. - What?
- But you said... - Fung. There's no such thing
as a Loki Qi Chi tool. I made it up.
- Once a bandit, always a bandit. - Does that mean you're coming back?
If you'll have me. And you promise to work on your temper.
What temper? Gah!
Oh, that. Yeah. Okay.
- Shall we? - After you.
Gah-ri!
sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ addic7ed.com ~